Transitions and Resettled: Acclimating to the States

Time flies, it has already been a few months back home. Zen settled right in, surprisingly faster than I had foreseen. Our plane landed on the first day of school (on a Friday), but it took the whole next week before she could go to class. It was paperwork, having to register her when my local Driver's license wasn't considered ID and just waiting.

She started late, didn't miss anything, is doing well academically and made some good friends right away. Her homework is minimal in comparison to Taiwan, she joined band and is playing her flute every day. Now she is starting fencing which I hope she will enjoy as much as she thinks she will.

As for myself, finding a job was time-consuming. Writing and rewriting applications and cover letters, it took a month before I had any bites. It was unsettling, being unemployed, like floating in the abyss. Would I teach or not? Should I apply for teaching jobs? I did-reluctantly. Should I try something new?






The Universe wanted me to take a breather after working full time as a single mom in a foreign country for so long, perhaps some part of my soul was tired.  So, of course, I wanted the stability (and paycheck) from working, but I enjoyed the rest as well. Fortunately, a new gym opened up and I joined, going every day was grounding. Taking yoga and spin classes helped me settle into a routine. I also started swimming again.

Date night with myself, Devandra Banhart at the Boulder Theater

At month two, I was hired, but since HQ is in Delhi and the formation of my group in Denver is like a "start-up" all of us new hires began a month later after that. I myself started a week later than them because my international background check took so long. Let's just say working for a multinational IT company based in India, has been interesting. My management is flexible about how we work our hours, we worked from home or left early when the snowstorms come, and we have s decent gym and I'm addicted to rowing.  I have health insurance which was a major worry when I left Taiwan.

Not that health insurance is anything to esteem here. It's free for all CO children at least. My coworkers all agreed that our plan is very good (United Health), but to me, it's contemptible (and still I'm one of the fortunate ones). For the rest of 2019, I chose the plan with a $5000 deductible (less money out of my paycheck.) For 2020 I chose the "Gold Plan" which I think is 85 x 2 USD a month I'm paid bi-monthly). Going to see my primary health care physician is $40 not including meds, an acupuncturist or chiropractor (which I  desperately need) is considered a "specialty" (so are mental health visits) and those are $60. Even seeing an "Urgent Care" clinic if we fell really ill costs $60. The health care system here is so complicated, with deductions, co-payments, premiums, blah, bla, just so needlessly expensive and inefficient. It's shameful. I'm still not 100% confident I quite understand how this is all going to work. I'll call my chiropractor tomorrow.

Getting used to the snow is another aspect to acclimating, and before that was the altitude. The first few times it snowed in early October, I was giddy, it was so pretty and exciting. My childlike glee was abruptly over when I had to scrape ice off my windows the following morning and wait for my car to heat off, shivering in the driver's seat, waiting for the windows to defrost. We have gone sledding with the kiddos, and I've been too strapped for cash to hit the resorts. I plan on being able to make a trip or two to the high country in 2020 before the season ends.

One of the biggest differences, of course, is being around so many white people. They're so tall and everywhere. My nephew goes to preschool in Highlands Ranch, my sister in law is Korean, and in his class picture, he is not just the only Asian, but the only minority as well as the only brunette. Highlands Ranch is in Douglas County, famous for its white males with the national longest lifespan. Recently, before we moved back there was a school shooting at the STEM Highschool, which is creepy every time I pass it. It's all just so alien.

Another major culture shock for us is living with our extended family. We live with my folks and my brother Ed. My other brothers and their family live within a mile radius and their kids are over 3-4x a week, sometimes more. So the house can be boisterous (like when I was growing up) and now we have a teen in the house. I have to listen to parenting advice from my mom on occasion, I help with the dishes, sometimes cook, sometimes babysit. My mom works hard feeding the little ones, taking them to school, my Dad is just as involved.

Our family set up is very Asian. It's fab for my daughter to be with her grandparents, uncles and aunts. She is still not sold on the concept of shepherding her younger cousins though.

The universe is gracious and we found a nearby Taiwanese restaurant whose owners adore speaking with my kid. They give us the Chinese menu and our bill has a lot of freebies. Sometimes, beef noodle soup with whole bokchoy is just the comfort food we crave on a cold winter day.

Halloween, came and went, then Thanksgiving. It was the first time my kid went trick or treating and she came back with a 6 lb bag of candy. Thanksgiving dinner was canceled this year. My mom, my daughter, one of my nephews were really sick. That was kind of a bummer, but if we waited for 11 years, we could wait for one more. So that means that expectations are for Christmas. It is building up to something sublime and meaningful. It will be our first Christmas with family, and in the States in 11 years. There's nothing like a Colorado Christmas, or so I imagine, it's been that long. Regardless, moving back home at the end of summer was perfect timing to see the aspens turn to gold and partake in the best holidays of the year.

Last Hurrah and Farewells: Goodbye Taiwan

View from the pool

 On August first we left Yilan for good. We took four suitcases and two carryons to Yuanshan MRT via bus. It was impossible for my daughter and me to transport our luggage with just 4 arms between us. One of the bus company guys (who lived in NYC for a year) taped up one carryon on top of the biggest suitcase, but it was still impossible, there's no way we'd be able to manage the MRT even though we just needed to go to the next stop.

I had to ask the fruit stand guy for scissors to separate my taped luggage and took a taxi to West Minchaun MRT exit 10. While I was waiting, I saw one of my former 9th-grade students walk past me, I called her over she took a selfie with me, such a small world!

Home Base: Taipei

My friend Alisse took a half-day away from work and met us, walked us to her apartment where we settled in our own rooms. We had a Japanese lunch and then we all went for a long, luxurious rooftop swim. She gave us a key and we made her home

Alisse, me and Z post swim

We planned on staying one night, but it felt better to stay two, Alisse insisted,  We stayed up watching the latest Avenger movie in two parts because it was so long. Z and I walked around Yuanshan MRT the next day, to the various gardens and of course, enjoyed the pool again.

The North: Tamsui/Sanzhi

My friend Sherry was only free Sundays, so early Sunday morning she and her brother picked us up at Tamsui, and we took the scenic tour back to her house. We stopped at the Fisherman's Warf, we drove around my former home when I lived in Tamsui 18 years ago, it is so much more developed, it even has its own light rail connection to Tamsui station,

Tamsui Mt from the North

Sherry's student/friend Andrea, who is also my daughter's friend came by and we went to the same river we visited eleven years earlier when we just arrived in Taiwan (Sherry and her brother picked us up from the airport then too.) Eventually, we made it back into Sherry's pool for a sunset swim. Andrea's parents invited us all back to their home for dinner and it was quite the spread, Taiwanese hospitality at his finest.

Andrea and Z

Sunset swim

On Monday morning we left with Sherry back to Tamsui station. She had to go to work at Kid's Castle where we met, and we had to get to Tainan.

The South:
Since we had more time than money, we took the bus (as opposed to the high-speed rail) from Taipei to Tainan, about a 5-hour drive. I saw a place we could get some tea and a snack near the bus stop. It was in an old wooden, hard to find Japanese teahouse, but the menu was expensive so we only ordered a matcha dessert and a peach ice dessert. Walking to find a taxi I remembered we'd be walking in front of the tax office, so popped in to check on why my refund hadn't been deposited. It comes every Agust 1st without a hitch, so I naturally was depending on that for my budget. Come to find out, they processed it late and I won't get it until September 10th.

Originally, we were going to stay at the new home of my friend/student's family. But he was busy with work and booked a hotel room for me (I paid) near my old work, in my old neighborhood. It was surreal to be back. The hotel was new and nice and across from a little park I often took little Z. She learned to ride a bike and roller skate at that park.

We invited 2 other families who we were once all old friends with, all in the same Anping neighborhood. Some of the kids were shy or had forgotten me, the older ones were so mature now. I had another parent/friend meet me to say hello, with her new baby in the backseat of her car, so a brief goodbye but long enough to gift us with some fabulous mountain tea. We had a nice dinner at our old favorite, "Forever"  said our goodbyes and then another old friend Grace came by our hotel, both of us catching up much too late.

Before check out time, we took a taxi to Tainan train station and headed south to  Kaohsiung to meet my friend Chloe during her lunch break. She and let us stay two nights, gave us a key and again we had our own rooms. The first day we met Z's old friend Maggie. Her mom was Z' swim teacher when she was little, she's also a single mom. Many a Saturday I had Maggie while her mom worked. She was and still is a joy.Her grandma dropped her off near the Fine Arts museum and we were going to explore the park, but it was too humid. Eventually, we ended up at this shopping mall/amusement park  Taroko Park, spending too much money at the arcades and virtual reality games. In fact, they only paid 1 game, I could only afford that, each kid was 500NT for an hour. They played some adventure  Indian Jones type game and it was more fun watching them. When we said our goodbyes I was feeling emotional.

Maggie and Z at the MRT

Chloe and I stayed up late, I met her boyfriend Sergio of 5 years (finally) and we watched some Netflix and sampled her Tennesee moonshine. Staying at her home was made more exciting because of her dog which is surly to strangers and an ankle nipper.

The next day we were tourists in Kaoshiung. We went to the pagodas (Dragon Tiger Tower), and the world's second most beautiful train station, In the late afternoon we met another of my former 9th-grade students and her family/friends for an hour of an escape room game. Chloe came home from work with a bag full of fresh mangosteen! Taiwan's new law came into effect the end of July, they allowed imports of mangosteen.

It was so relaxing staying at Chloe's but I had booked us two nights in Kenting and she saw us walking to catch a taxi on her lunch break. The plan was one last dive trip in Taiwan, but that was canceled by the typhoon. No water sports allowed all weekend. I didn't know what to do. We took a two-hour bus from Kaohsiung and our minsu/guesthouse (Blue Hotel) was literally across the street from the bus stop. The kind owner upgraded us to the bigger room for free. We walked to the closest beach (Nanwan) to watch the waves which were taped off. When a few rebels dodged the ropes, we did too and admired the crashing waves before heading back. While it was still daylight we rode on the go-karts, my kid nipping my tail and lapping me. I was laughing hysterically, it was so fun.

Sunset view from our balcony, night1, Blue Hotel, Kenting

The next day, unable to dive we rented an electric scooter. Our last beach out of town, the right break went out. and we waited for the owner to come and fix it for us. Then it was a slow, very windy ride around the southern tip of Taiwan. We had come to Kenting twice before and never made it here before. The scenery was stunning. It reminded me of parts of Okinawa. The lighthouse area was pretty, there were trails, crowds, we went to a few lookout points and then hit the road.

I'm not sure if it was such a bright idea to be on a light, electric scooter during the winds of a typhoon blowing past. The bike flew over a few times while parked. On the Eastern side of the southern tip the winds were more intense. The name of places literally were called "windy" so even on the best of days it blew like wild cliffs and during our stay I was driving slow and cautious. With our geeky shop helmets we joked we looked like Dumb and Dumber.

We ate near the bridge, a surfer cafe that served up egg salad sandwiches, children and dogs outnumbered the customers. Back to town wasn't far from there, but we took our time. We had wanted to go hike to a beautiful multitiered waterfall, but unsure of the typhoon didn't go. Oh well, that's how it worked out. We took another walk to the beach staying after dark, saying goodbyes to the ocean in our own way.

After check out, we took the crowded, two-hour bus to Kaohsiung, then the normal train to Taichung. Taichung train station is busy, and it seems bigger than Kaohsiung. Because my friend Binh was only free on Sunday, we headed to her anchingban (school after school) Saturday night during her last lesson of the week. We stayed one night in her and her girlfriend Kirin's apartment and the second night in her anchingban (because our bags were there.)

Taichung Botanic Gardens

On Sunday morning Binh took us to the Botanic Garden just down the road. There was a break in the rain and we walked there. In the afternoon, we went to their favorite hot springs resort about 90 minutes out of the city. Again, because of this typhoon, rain was a problem. Our phones gave us government alerts, that the area we were in was under a landslide warning. We left the hot springs earlier than planned but arrived late. On Monday morning we went to the newest Dentist that opened up shop next to their apartment building. Anticipating being without health insurance when we leave Taiwan and head back to the States, having our teeth x-rayed and cleaned was on the to-do list. For both me and Z it cost $11 USD and took 5 minutes of paperwork/waiting because we were new clients there. I'm already missing Taiwan's awesome health care system!

I'm proud of Binh's success with her anchingban. It's well run, nice energy she picks and chooses her students as much as they chose her. I admire her and Kirin being together so long, they're a great team. I hope to see them when the visit Colorado as Binh also hails from metro Denver.  Small world indeed.

Hsinchu
Our trip was nearing it's end, our life in Taiwan being wrapped with care like a present. Heading north eventually culminating in Taipei we had one last stop in Hsinchu.

I didn't plan on staying with Monica and Roger because I figured they have two boys and were busy. Fortunately, they had extra room and made time.  Her eldest son Mark and Z were old friends by now, as Monica and I go way back 17 years ago when we worked under Sherry. Mark and Z played games on the smart TV, board games, badminton. I thoroughly enjoyed her toddler. We drank too much red wine the first night and stayed up late talking into the night, talking with Roger about his work which is interesting as he travels and deals with different kinds of people.

The next day after a slow breakfast, easy morning, she showed us around her neighborhood. We strolled along the luxuriously wide sidewalks, the college,  her favorite cafe. The kids, plus Mark's classmate played hide-n-seek on these huge grounds for a good hour.

It's a nice and upcoming neighborhood, everything is new and yet development kept some relics, historical buildings from the past as well as constructing new schools in the traditional Hakka enclosed circular building style. The highest birthrate in Taiwan is in this area, as parents working at the nearby science park can afford 2-3 kids. There were fancy, alternative highschools with swimming pools and archery around the corner,  big sculptures and street art, and fun looking anchingbans with cooking and movement classes on every street.

Yoga on Monica's sunset balcony

 I think Z and I went to the best 7-11 we had ever been in Taiwan. It was all dark wood, like a Starbucks, more of a coffee shop vibe as there were more tables and chairs, a seating area with books, many English kid's books, and Japanese products we hadn't seen before.

On our third day, they were leaving in the morning for a vacation in Yilan (weird timing) and we were heading back to Taipei for our last two nights. Not in a hurry we took a slow train back to Taipei and returned to Alisse's apartment.

Our last day we hit the pool and gym, and met with old friends. My co-teacher and friend Alii met us for lunch and bubble tea. So strange to hang out with her in Taipei! Later Professor Jerome Keating, an American writer based in Taipei invited me for live music at his neighborhood pub, but I was lazy and it looked far, I made a raincheck.

The next night, my last night in Taiwan I met Jerome at his invitation at the Marco Polo Lounge near his house with top hat views of Taipei 101 as the sun set and it became happy hour. I didn't stay out late, I had to be ready for a 5am wake up the next day. As he walked me back to the MRT, he showed me his pub and then his house. His incredible house that once had many (I bet fun) parties, full of artists, intellectuals, politicians, every corner and shelf full of nicknacks of his travels with his recently deceased wife Monica. His wife's paintings were amazing, she used to have shows. She had early work that was traditional Chinese ink and they were professional. Then her own stills, so lifelike. It was a very nice evening with such a long term expat who has been in Taiwan before democracy and was there while it all has been progressing since. It made me feel my last night was a bestowment of class and wisdom.

Last night in Taiwan, with this view

I came back to Alisse's, she and Z were eating dinner,  thoroughly into their conversation (Chinese too fast for me and I can't understand). I loved watching them together, they were like old friends too.

Saying goodbye to Alisse before taking the taxi to Songshan airport

We arrived at the airport early and stood in line first. I weighed all the bags, some were overweight (23 kg was the limit for luggage).  I had time, I tried to rearrange and at check-in, Japanese Air said I could take some stuff out, put it in a bag as an extra carryon and it would be ok, free. The rest was a long slog back to D-town. Taipei to Tokyo to LAX to pick up our luggage go through immigration, customs, security again, walk to the domestic terminal and wait at our gate for the final plane home. Somehow we made it home.


Our last two weeks were like a concentrated microcosm of our past eleven years here. There's no way I could have survived being a single, working mom without kind people who offered us their friendship and help here and there.

Somehow I survived this stressful moving and leaving experience,  and again,  I could not have done this alone. All the kind people I've been blessed with from my coworkers, landlady, Z's former teachers, to friends everywhere offering us a home, a hug, some tea, a place to sleep, dinner, made our final Taiwan goodbye trip such a heartfelt sendoff. It's with loving vibes we were sent off to our new life.

Some say we'll be back, I've done it before. For sure I need to be back for a visit within 5 years to keep my APRC visa status. It's not something I want to lose, so I wonder when I'll be back for that visit?

On the Move: Bangkok or Bust

 Moving house is by nature, notoriously stressful. In Taiwan, my biggest move was from Tainan to Yilan six years ago.  I rented a truck and my friend and I drove it up to Yilan, while my mom happened to be in town and watched my kid. And while in Yilan, I had to move three more times. Yet, packing up and leaving Taiwan after eleven years proved the most difficult challenge. I got rid of most everything, donated bags of clothes to the only second-hand shop in town, bags and bags of books to the library. I even sold some things (scooter and car the biggest items) and somehow downsized our necessities into 2 suitcases and 1 carry one each.

I had a self-imposed deadline of July 31 to be packed and ready to leave Yilan. My rent contract was up but my gracious landlady offered to let me stay as long ad I needed. The first two weeks of July was part of my paid vacation. For one week I got rid of stuff, took photos and wrote details for each item, uploading ads on various FB pages to sell, my daughter helped translate. Our biggest worry was the dogs. I couldn't bring them to my home in Colorado and was posting doggie bios everywhere, with little response.

All of this was on my mind when the second week of July, I realized if I wanted one last trip around SE Asia now is the time.  My daughter wanted to go back to Japan or Korea, I was keen on the Philippines, but budget dictates, I found cheap tickets to Bangkok. I hadn't been back since 2002, it was my daughter's first time to the city, her second time in Thailand. We spent five nights a few blocks south of Khao San Rd, a place with a pool (Villa Cha Cha).

After arriving by airport taxi late afternoon and checking in, we chilled in our room for half an hour, checked out the pool and went out to explore. Before sunset, we had dinner at a vegan Indian/Thai restaurant/backpacker guesthouse around the corner, then walked down Khao San Rd on our way to our hotel. We bought a big bag of mangosteen, she got the best henna tattoo ever, bought a new swimsuit, and she tried a fried scorpion. It was like a wild night market, the greeters for the nitrous parties freaked us both out though.

The first full day we skipped the Palace and went straight for the temples, The Reclining Buddha at Wat Po, then took a river ferry across to Wat Arun.

We took our time exploring the grounds around Wat Po under tall noni trees and a nice breeze. I couldn't believe how agreeable the weather was, compared to seventeen years ago and I was there during July as well. It was overcast with a refreshing breeze. We were also lucky to stumble upon a school dance troupe of girls my daughter's age. They were practicing near the grounds dedicated to the founder of yoga.

Wat Arun

The Golden Mount (Wat Saket)

Wat Arun was very detailed and we climbed as high the stupa we were allowed. In the afternoon we climbed again, and went to the Golden Mount by tuk-tuk, stopping for some fried chicken at its base. At the bottom of the exit was an interesting exhibit of vultures and a corpse, displaying the temple's dark past as body dump off-site during the Bubonic plague. There weren't enough monks to dispose of the diseased bodies and the vultures preyed on the infected flesh.

Nearby was this giant swing, a Vedic religious relic we had to check out. King Rama started an interesting competition. A bag of gold was placed high above and the 2 man swing could keep the gold if they could grab it successfully. It was extremely dangerous and many men died. Swinging was officially outlawed for safety reasons. It's now in the middle of the road across from Wat Suthat.

The next day we went to the beautiful Jim Thompson house which was composed of several traditional Thai houses moved together. Inside, his art collection, pottery, furniture were exquisite and taking pictures wasn't allowed. He obviously had excellent taste and jump-started Thailand's modern silk industry. Each room was jaw-dropping gorgeousness, simple yet refined. The dark teak interior really set off the various pieces, Chinese pottery, Burmese buddha heads, Thai tapestries.

Outside in the courtyard was a Thai dancer and a man steaming the silk off the worms and stringing it traditional style. We spent the whole morning there and joined the English tour upon arrival. Jim Thompson's life seems curious enough a story for a writer. During WW2 he was in intelligence, trained as an architect, married in a childless marriage and he mysteriously disappeared in the jungles of Malaysia age 52.

 

Since we were in the area, we walked to a free temple (Wat Pathum Wanaram) in the middle of two massive, shiny metal shopping malls and after lunch hit the explosive Erewan Shrine. For lunch, we stopped at some local dive for delicious, simple meat and rice dish and took the bus back to our neighborhood. I had fried pork and chili basil and my kid got the less spicer chicken.

 

Day Trips:

The day trip options are many. We took two-day trips out of the city, group tours booked through our hotel. Of course, it would be cheaper to do it ourselves, but also more time consuming and we didn't have much time. The first trip we went to the very touristy Damnoen Saduak floating market.

 It all catered to tourists, souvenirs, art, nick nacks, snacks, a sketchy photo stand of exotic animals, captured illegally.

We shared our boat with three mainland Chinese. They were so slow to understand what was going on, my kid translated for them. They also weren't very adventurous and extremely tight-fisted. They didn't buy any snacks, while my kid and I were feasting on fried egg rolls, grilled pork and I bought a few souvenirs for friends. At the end of our tour we were given a printed and mounted photo of ourselves on the boat, which I gladly paid a buck or two for. The Chinese guy laughed when my kid told him how much I paid, but I thought he was the sap for not buying one.

Only when we got off the boat and wandered further into the market, past the art for tourists, did we see actual locals with produce for themselves.  We bought some jackfruit and ate it watching the boats.

 

Another day trip we went to the UNESCO ruins of Ayuttaya the former capital destroyed by the Burmese in the 1500s. There were several temple grounds that were spread out. The reclining white Buddha was beautiful, and the buddha head growing in the tree attracted the crowds, but I thought the grandeur of walking around the ruins was breathtaking. I had wanted to take my kid to Angkor Wat in Cambodia (I was there in 2002), so this was the next best thing.

 

Our last afternoon, my kid took a half-day cooking class with the vegan Indian/Thai guesthouse we had our first meal at. There were so many cooking classes around town, the prices for this were reasonable and the owners very nice. She learned the basics, making a peanut sauce and chili paste which were the base for her Tom Kha and Tom Yam soups and veg Pad Thai noodles. Needless to say, we both ate very well that evening.

The next morning before checkout we had time to go to the Museum. It was so massive we saw what we could until we were hungry and tired. I got a lunch box from next door our hotel and some fresh spring rolls on the street and we waited for our airport bus that was much cheaper and fairly direct.

It was the last jaunt before the serious packing, cleaning and ultimately leaving Taiwan for good. I also had to teach my last two weeks of summer school, so Bangkok was a fun memory for us, a distraction, an exhale before the final push.

Resources:
Photo Album
Villa Cha-Cha Hotel