Yilan: A good Thing Going, Why Change?

I just turned down that job in Taitung- not that I had it in the bag for sure. The last message I got at lunch about an hour ago was they were going to have another meeting to decide between me and another woman who is already in Taitung. I replied, "Let me make it easier for you all, I've decided to stay in Yilan." I felt such a relief.  Then I got another message that he was working with HR to hire us both. Oh well. Wish I could of figured it out before being on a train for 9 hours.

Passing Thru the Rift Valley

I don't know if the nearly 5 hour train ride there had knocked the stars out of my eyes, or what, but I just wasn't that impressed. I was getting the sinking feeling I was going to be a slave again, and I've been so free since Chinese New Year. There seemed to be a lot of unknowns and mixed messages and I came away from it overburdened with confusion. The presence or absence of peace is a major indicator which way I decided. Of course my ego is like, "I want this" because of past rejection, because of it been under a formidable leader for sustainable development in Taitung, because my kid could go to a Waldorf school, because its aligned with my personal values, was the biggest thing for me.

On the train ride back (another 4 1/2 hours) I realized I have a good thing going here in Yilan. Why would I give that up?

1. I think the climate in Yilan is better. I don't mind the rain, I quite enjoy it and this year hasn't been as bad as everyone warned. I don't have to exaggerate that each day is fresh and smells amazing.  Its pleasantly cool and sunny. I'm glad I'm not melting in the dry polluted airs of Tainan. If that means dumping liters of water out of my dehydrator everyday so be it. Everything but the parking here is serene.

2. My kid goes to an awesome school. Her class size is small in comparison to most schools, and they seem to balance academic, music and sports.  My kid was having trouble in math (she got an 80% on her midterm, which is basically failing by Asian standards), so now the school appointed a volunteer tutor (fabulous lady) twice a week to help her after school for an hour. I don't need to go to an after school anchingban or hire a tutor. She plays recorder every morning and guitar on Friday and she has half days twice a week.

 Her school is amazing, very supportive from the get go, and my kid isn't the easiest of students to have in your class. There's the language and cultural barrier with me as her mom, that takes extra time. I've been having growing pains with her homeroom teacher who is young and inexperienced. She called me into  a meeting a month ago for Z's attitude. To my dismay my daughter was organizing a class revolt, instigating the class to reject teacher's homework assignments. She would stand up and say, "This is too much work, who thinks we can do less, let's all unite and tell teacher..." I wonder where she gets it from? I had to explain that her class isn't a Democracy (maybe teacher can try "Flipping"), teacher is the captain and there will be no mutinies.  And there hasn't been since.

There was a recent incident, where her teacher made flippant, disrespectful comments, but she apologized (sort of, not to me, but to my translator and the principals) and blamed her statements on being seriously grieved, her grandmother just died. Fair enough. we all have our moments. She wants another meeting and is big on using LINE, so I think boundaries are an issue, I don't mind enforcing boundaries from time to time.

Long train ride, digging our heels in

The Waldorf school in Taitung just didn't sell it to me as a parent. The kids in that elementary school don't write until 3rd grade, my kid is currently top of her class in Mandarin (midterms 2 weeks ago), why would I want her Mandarin to slip and become mediocre? That's one of THE big benefits of living here. They also don't use any books or technology in grades 1-6, which I think is excessive. My kid is a bibliophile and spent the time of my interview and demo in their (small) library.

Also, the foreign teachers in the Waldorf school in Taitung, are trying to bring more sports into their curriculum as they, "Have more aboriginal kids from the  mountains who need to run around." Also foreign staff see the importance of team building and sportsmanship. So if they aren't big on books or computers and apparently sports, what exactly do they do? If its run around wild, enjoying the fresh air and nature, doing art, my kid does that literally everyday already. I dont need to move to Taitung for that.

3. My current job is also pretty darn good. I work for a Canadian guy with kids whose been here for years and he has loyal employees. He is easy to talk to, assumes the best, gives teachers a lot of flexibility and on his word, promised more hours next semester. It is also a relief to work for him. No managerial good cop-bad cop games.

Breakfast burritos on the train

I got the impression that there was too much internal conflict with the staff in Taitung between progressives and old school minded educators. I assumed because of the high profile leader and his reformist values that everyone would be on the same page or they would at least hire educators with similar forward looking values, but apparently that is not the case. I was forewarned to be "flexible".

I also got the impression that there was no real defined point between being  teacher and having a life outside the school. We had to spend at least an evening in the dorms providing that homey atmosphere they need and also that night 2 teachers had evening classes until 7:30.

 I have a kid, my off time is my time to be with her. I think its possible to be a good teacher, even be a parental role model without taking away my family time, but I got the impression that would be an issue if I took that job.

I like how much free time I have at the moment. I will be able to say how many hours more I want next semester. Not everyday I' m thinking.

4. My current living environment is fabulous. My apartment building is new and I'm across the street from the most sublime park in all of Yilan County, if not all of Taiwan (see Yilan's Best Kept Secret). I also started regularly going back to the gym for TRX and kettlebell classes, even Tainan wasn't offering that when I left it 9 months ago. I also think Yilan has way more bike trails than Taitung and better weather to bike in. (See Living Clean in Yilan and What's Not To Do).

5. Plans for going home in August remain. I dont have to put anyone out or change schedules. I need to go home and see my grandparents and not worry about making waves with a new job. My current boss is supportive.

What a relief to be happy exactly where I am!

The Dilemma: Should I stay or should I go?

So my life has turned into a Clash song. Lately, I have been questioning my reasons for staying (or not) in Tainan. My contract is up for renewal (or not). I have a pretty sweet set up, everything I need and want, I am "settled". Only downer for Tainan as a foreign female (at my age) is my dating life is a vacuum or worse non-existent, hence the urge to go some place like Taichung with lots of expats. I have nothing against Taiwanese men, unlike all the racist stereotypes back home of Asian men being feminine and weak--its just not true. There are loads of fit, athletic, masculine Taiwanese men, just if they are my age, they are all married. The younger ones just want to play. Pretty much all the expat dudes in Tainan have Taiwanese girlfriends.

My job is good, great coworkers, owner, the kids in my class are wonderful, we really adore each other. But, I don't feel like an adult (maybe that's good haha). I mean I have been taking care of kids and cleaning poopy butts since I was 5 (I'm the eldest of 5 kids). Even working in my 20's I took care of brain injured adults and in Germany also took care of mentally and physically disabled adults. I love the kids,  but this is definitely my comfort zone. I have this "education" I have yet to use in the way I envisioned. I have a job, not a career.  I want to be at my job because its my choice, not because its all I know, or comfortable or I am too scared to try some place different or go live some place totally alien. I want to live in Tainan because its the best choice, not because I'm "stuck." I want to explore my options.


Tainan has a lot of things going for it. The weather for one, probably the best spot in all of Taiwan. I am literally 1 minute from the beach. My gym just expanded and moved closer, like a 2 minute bike ride, my work is around the corner I can walk. Z will go to a very wonderful elementary school and I wont have to pay tuition like I am now, so I might actually save something and not living from paycheck to paycheck. Her school unlike most public schools isn't so anal on the academics and is small (rare here, most elementary schools look like our highschools back home). Her school has dance, sailing (on real little sailboats), Tae Kwon Do, and robotics (they actually make a robot). Sounds pretty cool.

At the same time I am restless. I want to use my Masters degree, which I worked so hard for and am in debt for. I applied to jobs in Hsinchu, Taichung, Japan  and China and have got interested responses, requests for interviews, yadada. But...

Oh the heavy decisions!

My heart, excitement, appetite for adventure was stoked when I read about Kunming, Yunnan. I found a university job there right in Kunming city.  I have other options in Yunnan who are interested in me. The pay at this university is about the same hour wise (700+ NT an hour) and I teach 2-3 days, not so many classes, but the salary (because of less hours) is half of what I make now. I know $$ isn't a problem I could easily find private tutoring where Id make more anyway. I also have free accommodation on the campus, health care and paid vacation.

Yunnan's weather is better than Tainan. Kunming isnt called the Spring City for nothing. Winters like Tainan and summers are cooler, with access to all these wonders of nature and history. I want a base in China to explore the country w/o living in the pollution (and yes excitment) of Beijing or Shanghai. Kunming to me as I imagine it, is like Taichung, alot of expats that are close knit (there is a Walmart, Costco and Carrefore for goodness sakes) and from the web forums there are ways to get Youtube and Facebooks as well as a healthy social,night scene.

I was all giddy and am just waiting for one of my managers to write my reference letter (not as simple as it should be for no surprising reason). Then I talked to my new manager who put FEAR into me with her China horror stories.I thought I heard them all, the spitting, cheating, out right theft, of course no gmail, Facebook and Youtube (ahh the horror!). But she said I have to find Z a good school-- a safe one. I guess China is #1 for child kidnapping and human trafficking and she knows people who lost their children right in front of them at the park. Also it almost happened to her son. Her mother walking her 2 boys and someone tried to grab her 3 year old. Scary.  It almost, almost made me just flat out decide against it.

I today suddenly lost almost all my appetite for Yunnan. I have to ask myself  some hard questions. First, I will not be subjugated by my fear or the fear of others. I personally find fear to be one of my #1 debilitating weaknesses--especially when it concerns my daughter. I also know myself, that I am not the most common sense sort of person and have maybe too much sense of adventure. So I will research on public schools there, pray, find expat forums about Yunnan and ask about kids there.

Time is on my side.